How to Discipline a Toddler without YELLING

How to Discipline a Toddler without YELLING

Oh, toddler tantrums, how I hate thee.

There are few things in this mom-life that are worse than a really bad toddler tantrum.

I can feel the anger and frustration building up inside of me like an old cartoon thermometer that is about to burst.

You either let your frustration get the best of you and yell at them (only to make the situation worse) or you give in to whatever they want just to get some peace and quiet.

Both are terrible options.

I absolutely LOATHE this situation and the horrible feelings that come along with it. Unfortunately, toddler tantrums are inevitable.

Luckily, with proper discipline, you can limit the severity and frequency of these tantrums.

Proper discipline will also give your toddler the tools they need to deal with their emotions, learn respect, trust, understand expectations, and become the polite and respectful toddler we all (desperately) hope they become.

Using effective discipline techniques can be extremely difficult for parents, but it benefits our children (and our sanity) in the long run.

It takes tremendous patience, a solid game plan, and follow-through, but hey, nobody said parenting would be easy!

I have always been motivated to learn how to effectively discipline without yelling.

I refuse to be the mom that has to constantly scream at my kids for them to listen or do anything I say.

It’s embarrassing, exhausting, and flat out not the mom that I want to be.

I have learned SO MUCH about effective discipline over the years, so I am sharing 7 simple steps that will show you exactly how to discipline a toddler without yelling.

 

1. STAY CALM

Reasoning with or yelling at a toddler mid-tantrum is completely pointless. They’re not thinking clearly, and if you get upset and start yelling, it will only add fuel to the fire.

Staying calm (but firm) will help them calm down quicker and avoid extending the tantrum with added stress.

Also, there are times that they act out just to get a reaction from you. If you react, it’s reinforcing that behavior and teaching them that is an effective way to get what they want.

It’s important to stay firm, do not give in, and do so in a calm manner.

TIP: Teach them to take slow deep breaths. I do this myself when I’m having a hard time staying calm. It leads by example and shows them an appropriate way to handle stressful moments.

Once they calm down, you will be able to talk to them and try to understand what upset them.

99% of tantrums are caused by acting out of frustration, usually, because they are feeling like their wants or needs are not being heard.

Yes, even ridiculous “wants” that make no sense. Like when they ask you to cut the crust off of their bread and then throw a tantrum because you cut the crust off of their bread.

Calmly talking to them about it allows them to feel understood and validated.

You will also be able to explain to them why acting that way is not appropriate and teach them a more appropriate way to communicate their needs.

They will be much more responsive to this approach.

2. CONSISTENCY IS KEY

consistency is the key

Toddlers want structure. Toddlers NEED structure.

They will test the boundaries to see what they can get away with, what is okay and what is not okay.

Staying consistent is the most critical component in developing structure.

If they do something that is sometimes okay and sometimes not okay, it’s extremely confusing to them.

They are trying to learn and understand limits and expectations. If you are not consistent, you are making it VERY difficult for them.

If you stay 100% consistent with what is acceptable and what is not acceptable, they will learn quickly.

Being wishy-washy or not sticking to your guns will completely undo any structure you have created.

This can be extremely difficult as a parent, but it will make your life so much easier in the long run. More importantly, it will benefit your toddler tremendously.

TIP: Avoid making empty threats.

Empty threats are detrimental to the structure you are building.

If you tell them that you’re taking away a toy unless they clean up their room, stick to it!

If they resist and throw a tantrum, do NOT give in!

Stick to your guns, because giving them their toy at that point is teaching them that they don’t have to listen to you when you ask them to do something, and if they scream loud enough they will get what they want.

I call this worst-case scenario in Mom-Land.

It’s incredibly important to have a united front between parents. If one says no and the other says yes, watch out.

You have just created a manipulating monster and they WILL be difficult to handle.

3. TIMEOUTS WITH A PARENT

Sometimes, kids get so worked up that they need a reset. (Don’t we all?!)

Remove them from the situation and do not give them the attention they are seeking until they calm down.

I don’t believe in locking a kid in their room alone, because I don’t want them to associate being alone with negative emotion.

Being happy and content on your own is a very positive and empowering thing, and I personally believe timeouts alone can counteract that.

Also, when kids are that upset, it’s not uncommon for them to throw themselves on the floor, hit themselves, bang their heads against the wall, etc. which can be very dangerous, especially if left alone.

When kids are hysterical, they need you to be there for them and let them know they have your UNCONDITIONAL love and support.

Removing them from the situation and not giving them the attention they want is showing them that their behavior is unacceptable, but sitting there (quietly) with them lets them know that you are there for them.

As I mentioned earlier, once they calm down you can talk to them about why that behavior is not acceptable and teach them how to communicate their needs better.

While they’re still upset, I like to grab a book and just start quietly reading it aloud.

This allows me to stay calm, not react to the craziness of their tantrum, and provide a calming distraction.

It typically takes no longer than a few minutes for the tantrum to be over.

4. AVOID HUMILIATION

Public humiliation is one of my biggest pet peeves.

Obvious humiliation is just wrong, but even disciplining your child in front of others can be extremely humiliating.

Humiliation will cause insecurities and resentment in your child. This is not only heartbreaking but can cause them to act out as well.

I know it can be embarrassing if your child is not acting right in public, and we don’t want anyone judging us or thinking we’re not in control of our own children, so we yell at them to stop or berate them for whatever it is they’re doing wrong.

Instead, calmly remove your child from the situation and go talk to them in private.

This goes for family members and siblings too.

Disciplining your child in front of their siblings or other family members is just as humiliating, so take them into another room to talk it out in private at home as well.

They will respond MUCH better when you treat them with respect and dignity.

Remember: lead by example! If you want them to treat others with respect and dignity, we should be treating them that way as well.

5. NO VIOLENCE

This one is obviously a very controversial topic, so I will just give my personal opinion and beliefs on this.

I believe that using violence (yes, I consider spanking violence) is completely unnecessary.

I understand that people think the generations are getting softer, brattier, more entitled, and I completely agree.

However, I can pretty much guarantee that it isn’t a result of not hitting our children.

I can also guarantee that violence will not change that behavior in the slightest.

I believe that structure, proper discipline, teaching them good morals, leading by example, and educating them is all it takes.

Yes, it’s easier to slap them around and instill fear, but I think that is pretty pathetic if you ask me.

We are the ones they look to for comfort, safety, and guidance.

Teaching them to love and trust in the very people who are hurting them is not only confusing and harmful to their understanding of love, but it also teaches them to resolve conflict with violence.

It is our duty to raise a decent human being and prepare them for the harsh realities of the world.

I just don’t believe violence is necessary to do so.

6. PRAISE POSITIVE BEHAVIOR

Toddlers aim to please.

They want to make you proud and see you excited and impressed by them.

Give them that satisfaction when they do something positive! It will encourage them to keep doing it.

It’s like when they do something funny and everyone laughs, so they keep doing it over and over to get that same reaction.

Use this to your advantage, and praise them for all of the good things they do! They will keep doing these things over and over as well!

When they’re young and just learning the ropes I like to praise EVERYTHING positive they are doing. “Thank you for being so kind!” “Thank you for listening!” “Good job picking up your toys, that is so helpful!” etc, etc.

I also like to end the day with some positive words and thank them for being so good that day, or if they weren’t, praise them for the way they corrected their bad behavior or find some way to end the day on a positive note.

7. LEAD BY EXAMPLE

We all know toddlers are sponges.

They will repeat everything you say or do, and that goes for behaviors as well.

If you are constantly reiterating that eating anywhere besides the kitchen table is unacceptable, but you are doing so yourself, you’re going to confuse them.

Your structure and discipline techniques will be much less effective because the message is not consistent.

Treating others with respect is also something they learn from you.

The way you treat your significant other, your friends, other family members, even your pets, they are picking up on all of it.

Be sure you’re setting a good example that is consistent with the behaviors you are asking them to follow.

This can be eye-opening because I never realized how many things I did that I DIDN’T want my kids doing! Being a parent is the most humbling experience, but I am so grateful for it because it has made me a better person overall.

I want my kids to be extraordinary. I realize that they will learn how to be extraordinary from me and my husband.

It’s difficult, but inspiring to know how big of an impact we have on these precious developing humans.

I hope you have learned how to discipline a toddler without yelling and will start using these methods TODAY! They really do work, so get started and let me know how it goes!

I would love nothing more than to know this helped a fellow mom struggling to navigate the slippery slope of toddler discipline.

Parenting can be stressful and exhausting! Always make sure you get time for yourself to make sure you are happy and healthy as well! 👇🏼

Check out my 5 Self Care Tips for Busy Moms!

Please share this article if you found it helpful! Join me on Instagram and like my Facebook page to be a part of an amazing community of moms!

Discipline without yelling takes tremendous patience and requires a solid game plan, but hey, nobody said parenting would be easy! Learn how to discipline a toddler without yelling with these simple and effective steps. #discipline #parenting #positiveparenting #toddlertantrums
How to TRAVEL with a BABY (+ ULTIMATE checklist)

How to TRAVEL with a BABY (+ ULTIMATE checklist)


Have you finally mastered the art of traveling?!
How early to arrive, when to check your luggage, how big your carry on can be, what snacks to bring, what seat to request, etc.

Adding a new baby to your travel plans can throw everything out of wack and add a lot of unnecessary stress to your trip.

Learn what to expect, how to prepare ahead, and eliminate that stress with these life saving tips on traveling with a baby.

We traveled with our first child when she was 6 months old, 12 months old, 18 months old and 19 months old. Here are all of my top tips that I learned from trial and error! (Lots of error 😆)

1. PACK SMART

family packing

It is natural to over-pack, especially if it’s your first time traveling with a baby. Try to avoid this because your bags will already be extremely heavy. Only bring what you really need.

Worst case scenario, you go to the store and buy what you forgot.

We made sure to bring diapers, wipes, extra clothes, a hat, a blanket, sound machine, bathing suits, bottles, formula, burp cloths and most importantly SUNSCREEN!

Be sure to pack any medications you may need such as infant Tylenol just in case a fever or a tooth decides to pop up.

*PSA: remember to pack diapers and wipes in your carry on.

Our first trip we were so focused on packing enough diapers, we packed an entire brand new unopened pack.

However, we forgot to take a few out of our checked bag and add them to our carry on to have during the plane ride! 🤦🏼‍♀️ We ended up having to scramble around the entire airport looking for a flippin diaper.

Luckily, there was a vending machine for diapers in the women’s bathroom! (who knew?!) Crisis averted, but we definitely learned our lesson.

2. CHECK WITH THE AIRLINE FOR AN EMPTY SEAT OR BASSINET ACCESS

bassinet in airplane

Some airlines have bassinets available! This is one of the most underrated travel tips for new parents.

Usually, they only have 1 or 2 available (if any) and it is first-come-first-serve.

They typically screw into the floor in certain seating areas and provide a safe way for your little one to nap during the flight!

If one isn’t available, ask at check-in if there are any open seats they can move you next to. Not having to purchase a plane ticket for your baby is great, but having an extra seat to spread out in is better. They will move you for free if any are available! This was a lifesaver for us!

3. CHECK YOUR CARSEAT FOR FREE

check in sign traveling

Most airlines will check your car seat at no extra charge.

We used the car seat while driving to the airport, got out and checked it at curbside. We already had a lot to carry so it was super helpful to get that off our hands right away (and for free!)

Another option is to rent a car seat from the rental car companies.

I personally did not feel comfortable using one that I was not familiar with and has been previously used by strangers. They charge an arm and a leg too, but it is an option if necessary!

4. AVOID EAR POPPING & EAR INFECTIONS

baby crying from ear pain

During the flight when the altitude changes, your ears pop. No big deal for us, super painful for babies.

Sucking on something will clear their ears and prevent the popping, so try your best to have them sucking on a bottle or pacifier at that time.

It can be really painful for them if their ears pop, and is likely to cause an ear infection as well. Not a fun way to start your trip.

5. FIND OUT WHAT BABY GEAR YOUR HOTEL OFFERS

baby crib

One hotel we stayed at provided a high chair and a pack-n-play for free!

That saved us a lot of trouble not having to bring those bulky items. There was no extra charge and the items were set up waiting for us in our room when we arrived!

Very convenient.

Some places charge a daily fee though, so be sure to call ahead of time to find out. If they significantly over-charge, try looking for nearby rental companies.

We once found a baby supply rental company nearby that even hand delivered & installed the items in our hotel room at a fraction of what the hotel was trying to charge us.

6. SKIP THE STROLLER

We have a B.O.B. stroller (that we love) but absolutely did NOT want to lug around at the airport and resort.

Initially, we contemplated purchasing a small umbrella stroller when we arrived, but once we were there we really didn’t see the need when traveling with a young baby.

We brought our baby-carrier which we used at the airport, around the resort and walking to different restaurants for dinner.

We really had no need for the stroller. Once your child is a little older (able to walk), I do suggest opting for the cheap umbrella stroller. Save your back!

7. BRING A FLOATING DEVICE

We bought one on Amazon that was cheap and easy to pack. (It’s the one in the picture above 👆🏼)

It worked like a charm!

Babies typically love the water, but it can get tiring holding them the entire time. Using a float makes the pool experience much more fun for everyone involved.

We also ran into another couple using a similar float, who said they forgot to bring one so they ordered theirs on Amazon and had it delivered to the resort!

I thought that was pretty clever rather than buying one that is way over-priced at the resort.

Vacation is so relaxing and fun once you arrive. It’s actually getting there that is the stressful part, especially when traveling with a baby or toddler!

Hopefully, these tips help relieve some of that stress! Happy travels!!!

Please share this article if you found it helpful! Join me on Instagram and like my Facebook page to be a part of an amazing community of moms!

Share this post with your friends on Pinterest!

SaveSave

Some links on this page are affiliate links. As an affiliate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

6 Benefits of Kids Growing up with a DOG

Before I had my daughter, my pets were my children. I spoil them and treat them like humans. To be honest, after having kids, that hasn’t changed one bit.

People would always ask me how I was going to handle bringing my children around our pets and how I would keep them from getting germs on them.

The answer is plain and simple: I don’t.

Here’s why:

There are so many benefits of growing up with a dog, I couldn’t be happier to share this information!

Dogs are such a special part of a family. They bring so much joy and love to the household every single day, but there are a ton of other blessings they contribute as well.

Companionship

If dogs are known for being one thing it’s loyal.

Dogs teach our kids at a young age what it’s like to have constant companionship and a loyal friend.

They show us what it feels like to be loved unconditionally. They provide a calming, nonjudgmental presence, which allows our kids to feel comfortable expressing themselves.

It is very common to find kids talking to their dogs, which is most likely because our dogs are always willing to listen and never judge. We can express how we are feeling without any fears at all.

This is more beneficial to kids than talking to a doll or an imaginary friend because dogs are actual living breathing creatures who will react to us and provide physical comfort.

This allows these skills of expression and acceptance to be more transferable to the real world. This also helps boost self-esteem, confidence, and helps with anxiety and depression.

Health

Several studies show that kids raised in a household where they have close contact with a dog are known to have a reduced risk of allergies, get sick less often, have fewer respiratory problems, fewer cardiovascular problems, fewer ear infections and fewer cases of eczema.

Wow!

Who knew all of that slobber and pet dander could be so helpful!

Early exposure to all of that along with the harmless microbes your pet carries in from outside helps to build your baby’s developing immune system, and in the end, they are much more equipped to live a healthier life.

Nurturing

Dogs are dependent upon us. They need us to care for and love them.

Dogs provide kids with an opportunity to nurture and care for another living thing.

Nurturing is not a skill we are born with, nor can we learn it just from having been nurtured ourselves.

We need something to nurture in order to learn how to care for and provide for others.

Dogs give kids that opportunity to learn and grow as a loving caregiver.

Responsibility

Dogs are a lot of work. They require a lot of time and attention.

They need to be fed, groomed, exercised, loved, and the list goes on and on!

All of these requirements give kids the opportunity to learn about responsibility, dependability, commitment, and patience.

There are many ways to teach our children these lessons, and I recommend them all! From giving them chores to learning why it’s important to show up to school on time, they are all important lessons to learn because responsibility is a very diverse and complex topic.

Growing up with a dog, however, provides an opportunity for them to learn about responsibility and how it can affect others.

We love our dogs and want them to be healthy and happy, so if we forget to feed them or don’t get around to playing with them for a few days, the outcome of that would be really terrible.

This helps our kids to understand in a way they can relate to.

Active Lifestyle

Kids that grow up with a dog are likely to live a more active lifestyle.

Dogs need a lot of exercise, which provides the opportunity for their owners to get more exercise as well!

Aside from the daily dog walks, owners are more likely to partake in outdoor activities such as hiking, running, swimming and camping.

These are all activities that are fun to do with your pet and encourage a healthy and active lifestyle.

Sibling Bonding

Siblings will always have their conflicts, that’s just how it goes.

Having a dog in the house, however, is known to help with sibling bonding.

Siblings tend to grow closer when they share a common love for something such as a pet.

They are able to share responsibilities and enjoy the fun times together when they play with the dog, walk the dog, etc. This can also reduce jealousy and rivalry towards one another.

I hope this provides some inspiration to those considering bringing a dog into your family, and also to the current dog owners out there to safely allow your kids and pets to form a special bond.

The benefits of growing up with a dog are endless and can really provide a positive impact on your child’s life.

Of course, not all dogs are kid-friendly and children need to be taught how to properly treat animals.

I’m not going to get into the nitty-gritty of a disclaimer/warning regarding pets and kids because I am assuming we all know the risks, benefits, and will do proper research before putting our kids in front of random dogs to obtain microbes and dander. 🙂

Please share this article if you found it helpful! Join me on Instagram and like my Facebook page to be a part of an amazing community of moms!

SaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSave

How to Increase your Milk Supply (overnight!)

How to Increase your Milk Supply (overnight!)

Our bodies are amazing.

It still blows my mind when I think about all of the extraordinary things our bodies are capable of, especially during pregnancy.

Breastfeeding has endless benefits to mother and baby, and a lot of moms want to breastfeed longer than their bodies allow.

That being said, you CAN increase your milk supply if you need to.

Here’s how I increased my breast milk supply in one day (and kept it up!):

GET TO PUMPIN’!

increasing milk supply by pumping breastmilk

Depending on how much you need to increase your milk supply, scheduled pumping will trick your body into producing more milk.

Pump about 30-60 minutes after feeding (when your body has had a chance to fill up again).

It is important to do this no later than an hour before your next feeding so you have enough milk available for your baby to consume.

Another way I like to pump is by feeding from only one breast and pumping the opposite breast immediately after feeding.

This is good if you want to keep your breasts producing evenly and not looking lopsided all the time.

(Here is the pump I loved)

PRO TIP: Collect a TON of extra milk by using a Haaka

LINKED BELOW

SUPPLEMENTS TO INCREASE MILK SUPPLY

increasing milk supply by taking supplements

Taking a lactation supplement can be really helpful! I used the Honest Company Lactation Plus capsules and they worked wonders for me! Whether you take a supplement, make lactation cookies, or use herbal teas, they all have pretty much the same ingredients. For me, I found the supplement to be the easiest to take on a consistent basis.

ONLINE COURSE: Breastfeeing & Pumping for new moms

This is my #1 favorite course for all things breastfeeding!
breastfeeding class

HOW TO INCREASE BREAST MILK IN ONE DAY: DRINK WATER!

increasing milk supply by drinking water

Drink a TON of fluids! I repeat…drink a TON of fluids! This is essential! Breastfeeding often, pumping often, you are depleting your body of fluids and nutrients.

You really need to replace the fluids lost or your supply WILL dry up!

Drinking plenty of water will literally increase your breast milk in one day. Literally.

But it is temporary. Make it a habit to keep that supply up and running for as long as you need.

My favorite way to make sure I was drinking enough fluids throughout the day was by using a cute tumbler! Having a tumbler that keeps your drink cold all day long and is easy to carry around and bring with you makes staying hydrated a breeze.

Here’s a link to my favorite one:

EAT FOODS TO INCREASE MILK SUPPLY

increasing milk supply by eating enough calories

Consume enough calories, in particular, PROTEIN.

As I said, you are seriously depleting your body of vital nutrients and in order to have enough energy to produce breast milk, you need to consume enough protein.

I used MyFitnessPal to track my calorie intake, which also broke down the amount of protein I was consuming.

I noticed a very obvious link to my protein intake and milk supply. Trust me when I say this is a key factor!

This is information I have gathered from research and from our pediatrician. This has worked for me, however, everyone is different so please take this information with a grain of salt and only do what is recommended for you personally.

Related: Tips on Returning to Work (after baby)

TAKE AN ONLINE COURSE!

I highly recommend taking a class on the subject so that you are prepared, have all of the information to make the best decisions for you and your baby, avoid any unnecessary obstacles, and have the tools to overcome any struggles you are faced with.

But what new or expecting mom has the time or energy to go to a class?! That is why online courses are SO convenient! Finish at your own pace, in the comfort of your own home!

Milkology has my favorite courses, created by a certified lactation consultant and filled with a TON of helpful information covering every single topic, free printables at the end of the course, and is SUPER affordable!

Check it out HERE!

milkology
milkology

Thank you so much for stopping by, I truly hope that these tips help you through your breastfeeding journey!

Leave me a comment below and let me know which tip helped you the most!

NOTHING makes me happier than making a positive impact on a fellow mama.

Some links on this page are affiliate links. As an affiliate, I earn from qualifying purchases.